GUTTER TALK
By Jeff Olson
Welcome to league bowling at Hood River’s Orchard Lanes! New bowlers, you are going to have a blast. There is nothing like rolling your ball down the lane and watching those ten 3 lb. 6 oz. pins dance! You will find that strikes have a characteristic sound, there is nothing like it. Equally exciting are splits that you convert into spares. When you do, you’ll hear raucous cheers from everybody! That feels good. Yes, bowling is challenging but that’s what makes it so rewarding when you succeed. In addition, you get to meet great people and there is a bit of competition involved too. It’s not too serious but as we all know, it helps to have something on the line. That makes you try your best and then it feels great when you win. Enjoy! Oh, and one more thing new bowlers, don’t be intimidated by our seasoned veterans. The handicap system in all leagues levels the playing field. And, as for our returning regulars as an old celebrity sportscaster used to say on TV, “It’s nice seeing you again!” For most leagues, we’re already several weeks into the season and we are off to a spectacular start! Scores are huge. Let’s look at the highlights, league by league. Monday Night Industrial League: The ace team of Pat’s Pro Shop is currently in first place with a 7-point lead. The Pro Shoppers are staffed by tough customers, legendary local cherry, pear and apple grower Joey Sheirbon, powerful John Mayfield, Orchard Lanes proprietor Patrick Olson and The Dalles star pin buster, Jenna Hert. Now, get a load of the big numbers that have already been posted in the Industrial league: Former junior leaguer at Orchard Lanes and stalwart for the MD team, power player Court Barker fired a HUGE 779 three game series! Court was a strike machine in this stellar set rolling gaudy 276 and 267 games. He had over 20 strikes in this series. X team’s Kevin Harris also jumped out of the gate with a cool 717 set To give you an idea as to who is hot note the log jam of 200 average keglers in the Industrial: Kevin Harris 212, Patrick Olson 212, Lynn Spellman 208, Court Barker 207, Joey Sheirbon 202, Rod Pratt 202, and Matt Hodges 200. Tuesday Nite Mixed League: The Mixed just started so 12 teams are still in contention to win the league. High series is an amazing 724 by staccato stepping all-star Jeremy Bloom. What’s incredible about this is that Jeremy broke his neck a brief time ago. Who would have thought the Bloom Auto Body specialist could jump back into the bowling limelight so soon after an injury like that. Wow! Erin Salisbury didn’t waste any time either as the all-star bowler jumped out of the gate with a nifty 615 series. Colts & Fillies Senior League: The standings in this league are also too close to call. It’s early, all teams are still in it to win it. Lynn Spellman is the main man in this league. He’s led the high game, high series, and high average categories in the seniors for what seem like forever! This season is no different, a couple of weeks ago Lynn’s down and in slants pounded the 1-3 pocket to the tune of a solid 707 series and he is currently carrying a lofty 214 average. Tops in the league. Rambling Rod Pratt is giving Lynn a run for the roses this season. Rod is also scattering the sticks like he usually does; he’s carrying a fine 201 average! Wednesday night Fraternal League: In this, the highest scoring, most competitive league in the gorge, the dynamic Get Hu’sum Pizza team is currently leading with 70 points. The pizza pie guys are led by fire-balling chef Stan Pratnicki, Colby Henning, and Jason Borton. Here are the big numbers in the Fraternal: mega hook artist Bill Pullum 717, Schwab’s main man speedy AJ Perdue 712, Chad Mason 712, the ubiquitous pin puncher Court Barker 710, and reigning City Tournament champion, The Dalles John Helm 700. There is a plethora of high average shooters in the Fraternal: Patrick Olson 223, all-star ex-Orchard lanes junior & state tournament standout Chad Mason 218, John Helm 217, AJ Perdue 215, Court Barker 215, Stan Pratnicki 214, Lynn Spellman 213, Bill Pullum 208, Nationals star & surfboard king Skip Whitley 207 and Orchard Lanes long time staffer Josh Worth 206. The rambunctious County league starts this week. No one has more fun than these folks. It’s definitely a big tension reliever from work for them. Let’s do a TEAM of the MONTH: Court Barker 779 Jeremy Bloom 724 Kevin Harris 717 Bill Pullum 717 AJ Perdue & Chad Mason 712 3,649 TOTAL PINS Scores like those would easily win at Nationals. Start thinking about bowling Nationals, the biggest bowling tournament in the world with a multimillion-dollar prize fund! It will be held in Reno next year at the National Bowling Stadium from February through July. For those of you who haven’t done it, it’s an overwhelming experience you’ve got to try! Keep bowling ‘em over everyone!